I'm going to share some real and hard feelings that have been on my mind and heart for over a year now. The only way for me to get my true and hard feelings out is to write and I considered not posting this post but I am going to for awareness and I am not naming names I am just genuinely and honestly expressing myself.
When I was first diagnosed and I wrote my first few blog posts I received amazing feedback from every one and even people who I haven't spoken to in years sent me messages and texts that I was inspiring and that I was in their thoughts and prayers and that they would always be there through it if I needed anything. I felt loved encouraged and supported!! I also felt never truly alone and as if I could fight my fight because I truly had a tribe of fighters behind me!
As my HD has progressed and everything is actually hard for everyone else it feels like they have chosen to distance themselves from me and never realizing how hard my fight is it feels like hey have distance them selves away and it only makes it harder for me. I have not received hardly any of those encouraging texts in over a year
Instead of feeling inferior and never alone I feel heart broken, hurt, and let down by people who mean the world to me and that I love.
It makes me appreciate those of you who keep me crazy busy and who don't see me because they have to but because they truly enjoy my company and those of you who text me encouraging messages!
I do appreciate all of you who supported me by buying my memoir!!
I do understand that HD is a hard and complex disease and If it's your first time witnessing it progre on some one who you love can bring up many fears and emotions that are hard to deal with. I know that every one is not sure what to do or anything that they can to to help. I'm writing this post to remind you and tell you that if you make this time out of your busy schedule that would meet the world to me but if it's too hard for you to see me then all I'm asking for is a simple text asking me how I am hanging in and a reminder that you love me and support me.
I'm praying that no one is offended by my post because It's at no one just a general realizations!